1 Do not give up
The first lesson Raj ever teaches us, and perhaps the best of the lot is, you do NOT give up in love. It does not matter if the girl hates you in the beginning, she moves away to another country, or she decides to agree with her dad's wish of marrying a well built Punjabi munda. You just don't stop stalking...er...loving her.
2 Always buy beer at a non-Indian run store
You never want to run into an old uncle at a family function who remembers you from the beer binge night long ago. And god forbid if it turns out to be your future father-in-law.
3 Engagements are meant to be broken
Girls need to think about themselves. Agreed that the guy you love is a complete romantic and is 'oh so charming', but a girl's got to be practical. Get engaged to the guy your dad looks out for. If he really loves you, he needs to work for it.
4 'Palat' is the test of true love
There comes a time in every crush's life when you are not sure if she loves you back. Put it to the 'palat' test. While you are seeing her off, just stand there whispering 'palat' to yourself. If she turns, she is yours. Of course, passersby might think you are crazy, but who cares.
5 If the girl finds you annoying, you're on the right track
This is a familiar lesson for Hindi film audiences, but there is something sickly sweet about it. If you notice her grimacing at your flirty, hyperactive, childish behaviour, you are on the right track. Of course, she will deny it, but Rajs know better.
6 Education is overrated
As 'Daddy cool' Anupam Kher says so succinctly to Raj, 'fail hona aur padhai na karna, hamare khandaan ki parampara hai'. Come to think about it, it did not go so bad for Raj. He gets the girl, goes back to London, lives happily ever after. Burn those book already!
7 Weddings are the Tinder parties of India
There is no better place to get hit on than at weddings. Especially, if it is the wedding of your true love. In fact, bring your dad along and get some father-son bonding going while you flirt with girls at the hall.
8 The girl's dad won't like you. Get used to it.
It does not matter what you do to help at the wedding, or his business, or his daughter, he won't like you. Period. He is the 'baap' of all troubles. Things get worse if he has a voice and personality like Amrish Puri.
9 Mum's the word
It is not for nothing that 'maa' is the answer to everything in Hindi cinema. If you have too much trouble with the dad, turn the other way. Mom's can be real helpful when it comes to their daughter/son's eloping in love.
10 Perfect your Shah Rukh Khan stance
No matter what you do, you will always be compared to king Khan. So you better find a green and gold khet and practice the 'open arm' stance. If that doesn't get you the girl, nothing else will.